[he cuts off, as if remembering or reminding himself that Romani's also one of those affected. the energy in the negative spiral dies off, but it just leaves Dazai staring at the bodies with the vague despair that he's always carried with him to one extent or another.

smile crossing his face reflexively.]

But... I did promise Odasaku. When he died. That I'd try being on the side that saves. Because maybe that would be better than what I had before.

I don't know if it is or not.

But the thought of dying now, the kind of ghost I'd become--it worries me what it'll do to those people more than what it means for me. If anything, for me it would be such a relief.

I'm tired of losing people, too, sensei.