thefoundation | WEEK 4 - VENUS FLYTRAP

[There's a little laugh from him as he lets his imagination run wild and free. Which is always a signal of impending doom.]

Ah, I wonder how you'd even make dragon kakigoori. I think you'd need to find a really good freezing spell, or someplace icy enough to stick an entire dragon into.

[But it would totally make it easier to share?? Just break up the dragon like one of those double popsicles. That's clearly the point here. He hums briefly and then falls silent, letting the mood settle a little, though his reply is still lighthearted.]

Right, when they all had that summer cold, huh. It's like looking at all the servants here and spending all your time moping at them instead of finding a way to play the Game properly. [zero!! sympathy!!] I bet I'm not the only one who wants a cool funeral, though. Sometime, I want to find out what the coolest funeral in the universe is.

And then I'll totally steal some of it.

[Does that give you the bizarre image of him swallowing an entire funeral. Good.]

[ Y'know he was thinking small. Like cutting off a slab of dragon meat and then shoving it into an ice cream maker or reducing it into a syrup and then pouring that over shaved ice. There's a realization on his face that clearly he wasn't thinking big enough, and he's spurred on by that laugh. ]

Someplace icy enough...like a glacier? [ What else does a dragon fit into? Why is he discussing this seriously and enjoying it? It's a mystery.

It's always easy for Natsuno to get lost in things: both the big and the small. Here it's a gentle redirect, connecting two different points together instead of getting stuck on what he usually does. It's this mix that makes him state this next idea completely innocently. ]

Cold, cool... if you had a frozen dragon at your funeral, it would be all of those things. And if it thawed people could fight it.

[The real problem with Anon is that his limits are literally sky-high, so he has a tendency to push everything else in that direction, even mundane(??!) discussions of desserts. Think big, always bigger, and the mischief in his grin is just all over the place as he watches the changes in Natsuno's expression.]

Mmhmm, a kakigoori needs to be shaped, right? Glaciers are things that shape the landscape, so I bet they could shape a dragon. I've always wanted to see one work!

[Too bad glaciers move at like 0.5 miles per a zillion years. But look, he's all for brainstorming stupid ideas, that's his (their) entire brand for some reason. Anon cocks his head as the sudden idea smash happens, seeming a bit bemused but unsurprised somehow. He's done it before too, the whims and bounciness of his thought process keep up well with this sort of thing.]

That's not a bad idea at all, actually. Maybe the coolest funeral is the coldest, and it can be all super cold bodies! [why is this them, why is it all weird gallows humor] But the best way to thaw a frozen dragon is dragonfire, I think? So maybe I ought to have two dragons at my funeral. The second one can also set me on fire!

Mmn, it needs to be shaved. But first it needs to be frozen, so a glacier still works. I guess we don't need to shave it though, but then it would just be a dragon icepop.

[ Natsuno has no idea how glaciers work, but he has faith. Literally (subdued) kermit nod here until the fire part and then he laughs suddenly, taking a second to catch his breath. ]

I wish you could have given everyone in Sotoba that idea, then we wouldn't have had any Shiki to deal with at all. I'm for it.

If we're just adding more dragons onto the pile, I want to try a kakigoori one, and an icepop one, and maybe also a roast dragon but the glacier isn't going to help with that. How much are you up for eating a bunch of dragons?

[This has gone so far beyond drinking dragon blood and a paltry eating contest, what is even happening anymore. Anon seems perfectly happy to just keep speculating, though, and pushing towards more and more absurd lengths of dragon devouring. At this rate they're seriously going to cleanse some world of dragons.

There's a little quirk to his smile when Natsuno laughs, still that inquisitive tilt to his head but something pleased about it, too.]

Right! Because Shiki are totally weak to all kinds of burning, huh. Then it's decided. Only burning funerals from now on.

[Which still won't help with Nirrti's everything, but they can dream a little here.]

If you're going to have roast dragon then I want dragon hotpot. We can probably find a volcano to help with those. [ Demanded rather than stated, it answers Anon's question on it's own. This is happening now it's settled, for better or worse of all dragons and future worlds involved. ]

That and they can't rise from the dead if they're just a pile of ash. That'd be kinda a pain if they could, but then we could just vacuum them up.

[ They can dream—limitless, full of dragons, fire, and stolen appliance's from a certain plumber's mansion. ]

Ahaha, I don't think I've ever had hotpot from a volcano! You could have enough hotpot for the whole Game and then some. How many eating contests is that??

[There's something silly and somehow delighted about Anon's response, as he rocks forward on his heels a little bit, eyes bright. He's absolutely picturing eating dragon straight out of the volcano?? Who needs the pot in hot pot when you can just use the caldera. No problem, obviously.

(He enjoys the certainty of Natsuno's demand, too, the unnecessary seriousness of it -- between them this is totally going to get done, as ridiculous as it is, and that's something to look forward to.

He's always liked dreaming big.)]

And if the vacuum doesn't work for the Shiki, we can just throw them in the volcano. I'm not sure how good the seasoning would be, though.

[ He falters just a second, but recovers quickly enough. It totally didn't just occur to him how ridiculous this all sounds, but they can work it out later. ]

Neither have I. It would be... a whole lot of food. Enough to feed all of Sotoba, probably. [ Sometimes you need to state the obvious because it's necessary and sometimes you need to because all you can do is pretend you know what you're talking about.

Making a face at the suggestion cause here he does know what he's talking about? As much as he tries not to think about it. Hngh. ]

They don't taste good, it would ruin the hotpot.

[Anon catches the faltering, easily as he catches everything else, but he just cocks an eyebrow at Natsuno -- unrepentant, almost challenging -- and there's something laughing and almost approving in his eyes the deeper Natsuno digs himself into this literal volcano of exploding ideas. All the same, he's still listening and happily considering, because of course he is.]

I bet eating dragon at all would knock all of the town's socks off! It's almost a waste! [they totally wouldn't appreciate it, after all] I'd say we should keep most of it for ourselves, and then use the rest of it to knock everyone else's socks off.

[It's much more likely that they'd kill someone or set everything on fire. But it's fine!! He watches the play of expressions across Natsuno's face. Shiki are totally a complicated topic, huh. Hmm.]

That just means we need a few more volcanoes.

[Good thing those come in chains.]

Half of them would probably die from shock, so maybe it wouldn't be a complete waste. [ Here he grins, fang-fulled and all, this is terrible. ]

Yeah, that would work. I don't know what we could add for spices, though. [ He's clearly riled up from the thought of watching half of Sotoba drop dead, but he taps a finger to his lip, thoughtful. ]

They're really delicate over there, aren't they? Heart attacks, dragon attacks, all kinds of things... There's so many ways for them to freak out and die! Or die and freak out.

[After all, that's a possibility too when it comes to Natsuno's hometown. Apparently.

There's a pleased curl to his grin -- he'll take this as Natsuno's response to his challenge, and it's totally more than acceptable because all these weeks later bloodlust is still an excellent common past time. (It might have gotten worse at this point, but who's keeping score?)]

Hmm, shichimi to start-- [since that's where they started somewhere in the endless roll of this thread, wow] --but if you want something with more kick to it, maybe some spices from the Underworld would work. I hear humans have something called a ghost pepper, but the stuff we have could probably make the ghost pepper into a ghost!

[That makes no sense but whatever. You get the idea.]

Mmhmm and because they're mostly so old too. [ There's almost something bragging about this, because it's the one thing he doesn't really need to worry about anymore. And hey, he's all about embracing who he is now right? ]

Shichimi would be good start, yeah. As long as it's not a Shiki pepper. [ That also makes no sense, but he's joking here going on his expression and delivery. ]

We should try that, though. It's not like it could kill me or anything, just make me really thirsty. I wonder if blood would help there...

[ Licking his needle sharp incisors, it's apparently something he's wondering about for the first time. He really has come a long way to normalizing his blood drinking these past few weeks. ]

It's definitely past time for them to step off the stage already.

[There's laughter in his voice and irreverence all over, because what is respecting your elders. He literally threw that so far behind him it escaped the gravity of the planet and catapulted off into space and possibly into another Fragment -- perhaps one where things went very differently. But that's neither here nor there.]

I don't think I want to eat a Shiki either! They sound like good hunting, but not very tasty for vampires.

[As if he's ever nabbed a vampire?? There's just the most casual shrug here in response to Natsuno's own contemplations, teeth in his own grin.]

Blood for one of the real hell peppers doesn't sound like a bad way to go, though.

[ That earns Anon a dark laugh—respecting your elders had been so drilled into Natsuno upbringing but it amounted to nothing in the end. All they did was sit around and complain about not breaking customs, gossip, and become literal fodder for the Shiki.

When he recovers he gives a sharp nod. He could talk about how it tasted but he only has one experience feeding from a Shiki, and he doesn't want to ruin this mood. Tohru mistakes can be for later in the week. ]

Then that's what I'll do. We can even make the human try one of the peppers first and see if they're strong enough to deal with it.

[ Let's just throw brainwashing on top of murder, why not. ]

[Sometimes you really have to kick the past to the curb; or at least the decrepit and rotting parts of it, the parts that only know how to talk and not how to act, the people who hold you back and everything else they've collectively disowned. Strangely, in a Game where they're trapped as Pieces, freedom seems more within reach.

So there's an answering and familiar gleam in Anon's eye, because here they go again, and he couldn't ask for a better way of discussing cuisine. Apparently. They can worry about secondary vampire cuisine later.

It's really a good thing they're still just starting to explore the kitchen at this point.]

Ahaha, I really don't know what would happen! Maybe it would be like Nirrti's flames, and they'd just get burned up, or there'd be a lot of screaming, so maybe you should get blood first. [because all of the above might happen??] I've really never tried feeding a human Underworld food before.

[From the way he says it, this was definitely an oversight.]

Edited 2019-05-24 01:33 (UTC)

Hmn. Blood first, but just a taste. If they catch on fire it'll be better than nothing, and if they don't then I'll be able to compare how the pepper affects the taste. [ Why is this what they're talking about. How did we get here.

Feeding still isn't something Natsuno likes to do but he's accepted it at this point, and the temptation and curiosity is very real in this imaginary scenario. He's licking his lips just thinking about it, there's still shades of his human likes buried in his jinrou palette and spicy food was his favorite. ]

It'll be a fun first experience, then.

Ooh. So like a taste test! I never really thought about it, but it's kind of like vampire cuisine... if you start feeding your food food.

[Sometimes you end up spending way too much time with a vampire, after finding out very recently about how exactly vampire lore works, and suddenly your perspective on the world changes in all kinds of messed up but interesting ways. Anon's learning a lot, and he has no idea why or how he's here, but he's here all the way. Somehow.

He's absolutely gauging the reaction and taking notes. This is a disaster for the future, please see the following:]

It's definitely going to be fun. I bet we can experiment with other seasonings and things, too.

That sounds funny. [ "Feeding your food, food." but he has a wry smirk on his face anyway. His sample size isn't very large, but he's fed from enough people to know that they all have distinct notes and flavor profiles. Thinking of that, what he likes best so far is... ]

Mn? I think that almost happened at the Foundation with my interviewer. I tried to bite him the first time and when he came back I think he ate everything with garlic he could find.

It is pretty funny. Nothing really changes depending on who I swallow unless they really come with something weird attached. I think the really powerful guys are tinglier, but other than that it's about the same!

Still, I haven't tried with that many weirder SCPs yet.

[Like, they've fed him a few Agents and he's definitely swallowed some less humanoid things at this point, but the Foundation was perhaps understandably nervous about feeding him anything too far off the beaten path.

And then he swallowed Ichigo and the rest is history, but for the moment he's still thinking in terms of flavors. Hmmmm... He definitely snickers at the thought of the interviewer scuttling away to drown themselves in garlic.]

Ah, how did it taste? Did you get him in the end?

Edited 2019-05-24 17:00 (UTC)

I wonder if you swallow an ice golem or something would it feel cold? [ Temperature is different than taste, right? Also blame their recent dragon adventures for him reading up on more mythological things. ]

No, I decided to play along after they stuck me in isolation for a while. I was really tired after that... [ It actually was not a good time because he's way too inward facing on his own, let alone when he's forced into it. ] But I'm sure he would have tasted awful, garlic is way too strong. It wouldn't bother me or anything though, just like I can still use mirrors just fine.

[ ...he can't even blame his terrible fashion sense on not getting a good look at himself smh. ]

It would totally be a bit chilly! I'd have to be careful not to get my tongue stuck.

[That's probably not how that works?? Anon seems like he's contemplating stuff like this for the first time, there probably aren't many ice golems or other such things in the Underworld, so now they're both getting somewhere. No one knows where that is at this point.

Mythological gastronomy sure is a thing???]

Garlic tastes pretty good if you don't just use gallons of it, so at least you still have that! I bet they didn't even feed you in isolation, did they? The Foundation really likes to pull stupid things like that, just because they like hoarding powerful things until it all blows up in their faces.

[There's a grumble in his voice -- it's not dissimilar to when he first got here and would regularly complain about the Foundation's containing ways, but the difference this time is that he seems rather offended on Natsuno's behalf.]

I really hope it blows up in their faces soon. I want to watch.

[ That sounds like how it works though. It honestly makes him wonder too, if he drank from someone who was suffering from hypothermia would it be a noticeable difference? Maybe this is a quandary to solve when they go dragon glacier adventuring. Hmmmm. ]

I don't think I need to worry about things like that. Even if I broke my fangs, I think they would just grow back. [ But he's not eager to find out. ]

I've only had garlic a few times, we don't really use it in washoku. [ He sighs at the Foundation bit, a lingering agitation there. ]

They didn't, not even turtle soup. [ ... ] Me too. It might be even more fun than watching Sotoba burn.

[These dragons and glaciers really do have so much to answer for. They might need multiple draconically-inclined worlds at this rate, but it's not like Anon would complain about expanding their very dubious buffet options.]

Wow, so you've never broken a fang before? [a beat] Actually, I've never thought about vampires breaking their fangs. You'd probably end up needing to drink blood through a straw at that rate.

[Can you imagine this. Geriatric blood drinking, the worst. He gives a little huff because the Foundation continues to be rude, so he's going to continue being rude about them. It's only fair.]

No varied diets, no basic diets, and their containment sucks, I really can't decide sometimes if it's a good thing they're that incompetent. [but some of that incompetence is probably how they ended up here, so he lets it go a little] Mm, can you imagine, though? What would happen if you released all the most dangerous SCPs at once, and then set the sites on fire. It really would be the end of the world.

[Probably. A few dozen times over. This is why the Foundation didn't let him do things!!]

[ Natsuno wouldn't either, even if he could (rightly) blame Anon for encouraging his newfound gluttonous tendencies. ]

That would be awful. [ Making a face!!! ] No, I've never really drank much before. And I've only been a jinrou for a bit so...

[ Very much a baby jinrou who violently abandoned it's nest and then set it on fire. Which seems relevant here, really. ]

I wonder if it would be like one giant fireworks show. [ There's definite approval in his voice. ]

[As always, Anon is here to help him live his best (un)life. That's what he's all about.

There's a happy snicker at the face Natsuno just made and of course he had to picture him trying to drink from someone's neck through a straw, too. It's truly almost a pity that he probably won't get to see that in person unless they do terrible things to some hapless passing vampire or unless Natsuno really, really loses to dragonhide.]

Heheh. Don't worry. If you ever do break a fang, you can totally have one of those crazy straws. [is that really consolation though] It's decided, though. We're definitely going to try every kind of blood we can get our hands on. What's the point, otherwise?

[He's definitely being a little silly -- but he's also perfectly and pleasantly serious. The two are a necessary coexistence when it comes to him.]

There would definitely be all kinds of fireworks, and all kinds of fights, too. Ahhh, it's so tempting.

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