A New Friend (?)

[foundationnpcs]

[It is well into the evening on Sunday by the time a strange message pops up on everyone's tablets. It's from an unknown sender, with only a little skull icon to identify himself by.

And this new person has quite a bit to say.]

Well I'm not really sure what the fuck just happened, but that dog bastard is gone so I'm going to assume it went well. Good job, it only took you three weeks to finally make some progress here.

Not that I'm blaming most of you for the complete failures of the previous weeks, all the adults who are supposed to be wrangling the rest of you are too busy wrangling each other's dicks. I expected the love-dodecagon smoochfest from the teenagers, but I expected better of the rest of you. Seriously, priorities? Have you heard of them before?

Anyway, I'm sure you have questions, and I'm in a good mood tonight since you finally got something done. So ask away. I'll be around, until you get too annoying.


[All threads in this post are public and can be seen by anyone.]

Comments

[foundationnpcs]

Maybe you should drink a glass of water and eat a damn sandwich first.

[justfists]

believe it or not, i can multitask. and sandwiches are a bad starting food, from a medical perspective.

i don't trust the monsters. someone who has taken over an unwilling host should have to answer for it.

but it's apparent to me that you don't trust us, either.

[foundationnpcs]

I trust exactly four of you right now.

The rest are still up in the air.

[justfists]

then tell me how to earn it.

[foundationnpcs]

One: don't be possessed.

Two: Don't go fucking around in my head.

Among other things.

[justfists]

both seem to have been checked off.

what's next?

[foundationnpcs]

3: finish high school.

[justfists]

funny. as far as i can tell, high schoolers haven't had a problem saving the world before. you might want to rethink that one.

[foundationnpcs]

This world can't be saved.

[justfists]

i'll fight you on that.

[foundationnpcs]

If you want to tire yourself out, go ahead.

But this SCP we're in? Is number 6893.

That's 6,893 different things that could potentially end life as we know it on this planet. And counting.

Shit's fucked.

[justfists]

and there are almost 2000 official causes of death normally. you have a bad sense of ratios if you think that means "shit's fucked."