thefoundation | [CONTINUE + 3] INTRO

[After so long a trip, you're all finally here. Taken through a hidden passage inside of the very mountain itself, you find yourself standing in front of a field of flowers, growing well due to the open roof above it. If you look up, you can just make out the shimmering colors off of the barrier - looking almost like the shine off of a soap bubble.

Try not to trample on the flowers as you approach the open, purple gate. And remember to wear your masks, now that you're here!

...Still, the sight of the yellow flowers waving in the wind....such a cheery sight fills you with determination for what's to come.

Welcome to the Underground.

...Again. The loop happened again, and you're here. Everything is the same.

Someone who was dead is alive again.

...The man, who's name you forgot...You've just forgotten almost everything about him. Anything he did, or said....there's just a person-shaped hole in your memory now.

You know someone was there, and that he was important. But....

Not only that, But more monster names have faded from your memory.

...You're losing so much.]

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[He drops to his knees, a hand extended out - there was a slight tremor in it]

How... can I not - something - someone important is missing. We're... getting answers, but Monsters are disappearing - we're losing things.

[Quietly]

You're... part of that was taken.

Edited 2020-08-29 21:55 (UTC)

[Inaba can talk to or not talk to whoever she wants. Karen's quietly going closer to get a better look at the spider.

And by get a better look at the spider, I mean put both arms around Inaba.

It is the spider that she addresses, though.]

You're... our friend.

[Even if she can only guess that from context.]

[Just give her a moment, she's going to use her free sleeve to wipe her tears. She hasn't been - or felt this weak in such a long time. She always had to put on the mask (ha) of strength - the whole time.

Someone's got to keep things together.

But now?

She can't.

She can't.]

I'm... not as close - I think - as the others, but... isn't it unfair, to stop those emotions? Aren't they just as valid as anything else? I hate it, but -

I think if didn't... wouldn't it be worse...?

Edited 2020-08-29 22:16 (UTC)

[There's a long pause from the Spider, as it tries to look at all of them in turn, pausing with it's attempts to soothe her.]

* ...i don't
* know....
* I don't
* know anything....anymore....
* ....
* can I
* no longer
* do anything
* to help....?
* ....
* ....where is...
* the rest....
* of me....?
*
* if I were
* whole
* Maybe...then....i could keep....
* such young women
* from crying....
*
*
* but i'm
* fractured
* not whole
* so i
* cant
*
*
* maybe i never cou...ld....

[The Spider seems to shiver, a bit.]

We'll - we're going to find the rest of you.

I promise.

[He closes his eyes, looking to Inaba and Karen]

We - can - no, we have to keep moving, I hate feeling like this... but.

[He learned, was it really worth living to not feel anything at all?]

[...she knew it.

Karen leaves the spider to Sherlock for now--she doesn't really understand what's going on there, and the two of them seem to have a connection--and focuses instead on the problem she understands all too well.]

It's all right, Inaba. You're allowed to have your feelings. You don't have to hide them away.

[She doesn't know what to say.

What are the right words to say? Were there any 'right' words to begin with? That's something that Inaba isn't sure about - that, perhaps, maybe she never did to begin with.

She sniffles, knowing just how much she's cried, how much she feels like every last bit of her is about to shatter and yet, somehow - she's still here.

The guilt pangs hard in her chest, and she can feel her anxieties swell up. She's not crying anymore, at least not now; not immediately - but there certainly is still something watery that settles in her voice.

What she says next is directed at the spider, as she slips her eyes shut, trying to recompose herself as best as she could.]

It's okay. It's - [A sniffle, as her free hand grips onto the hem of her skirt] it's okay - I think... you've helped enough. I may not remember it well - but I'm certain that you were always doing your best.

So it's fine. I... probably would have been hurt, no matter what. It's not your fault.

[Her dark gaze shifts to the floor, and the kind, watery tone just -

Stops.

There's something icy, frustrated; a bubbling fury that's settled beneath the surface, unseen in her expression. Her next words are directed at the pair, even if her heart's not entirely in it.]

Holmes - we probably should put the spider in some hot water.

[Since she can feel and see them shiver.

Then, directed at Karen, in that same, somewhat monotonous, icy tone:]

... Maybe. I promised I wouldn't run or lie. My feelings are too ugly, too disgusting for anyone. Because nobody understands them. I can't find anybody in the world... who would want to hear my feelings and not wind up disgusted, or angry, or upset about it.

And I don't want to be the one to stab someone in the heart like that. I wouldn't be able to handle myself at all if I did.

Edited 2020-08-30 00:36 (UTC)

[His eyes closed]

Emotions can't be understood - why did you think I spent much of my life pretending I was nothing but a logical machine? Because it's ugly, messy, confusing, and shameful. It's like you said, it's worse when someone else suffers for it - that it hurts them because you're hurting or because they don't want to see why you're feeling like that.

[Then he falls silent, before speaking shakily as he starts to stand, Spider in hand]

Sorry... this place, this enemy of ours is breaking us down.

It's frightening, isn't it? The thought of letting your feelings out, after you've kept then in for so long. It feels like you'd be betraying everyone. It's especially hard because you know how everyone feels about the version of "you" they know. Even in the best case, even if no one is upset to learn how you feel, you won't be the rock everyone else can lean on anymore, because now they'll know you need support, too. You look at how people rely on you, and it's hard to think you have the right to take that away from them.

[...sigh.]

That's how it was for me, anyway. For all I know, I could be the only one. I... you're my friend, and you've helped me when I needed you. I don't like not being able to help you when you're the one suffering.

Nothing to apologize about.

[She shakes her head as she raises it from the floor that she was staring at, reminded of the flowers and their meaning -

Cruelty.

Grief.

Jealousy.

She can't help but relate, a little.]

And... yeah. Well - I don't expect anyone to be able to help me when I'm suffering to begin with. But I can't just keep on leaning on Atsushi, or anyone else. This is my own, personal problem; it's something that I can only deal with on my own.

[She's firm on that point.]

Anyway... [Her words are calmer now, quieter. Not as monotone or icy, but not watery, either as she slaps her cheeks, trying to pull herself together again.] We probably should get going.

[He nods]

'God helps those who help themselves' is a saying as old as Aesop.

I wonder though... if adding tea with anti-inflammation or pain-relieving properties might help?

Just... remember the offer is there. All right?

[Karen forces herself not to go any further than that on that subject.]

Green tea, maybe.

Mm.

[She won't take it - it's too risky for her to. Even if she doesn't want to run away from truths... she isn't going to purposely stab herself in the foot, either.]

Green tea, black tea, ginger tea...

Rooibos is probably a good option as well.

[CONTINUE + 3] INTRO

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