[CONTINUE] week 1 || act: investigate

[foundationmods]

[Everything is still, silent, and dark - just like it should be.

Thursday comes, and there is no angry captain waking you up, no crowd of people.

But there is still, undeniably...

a feeling of foreboding.

You know what this is.

One of your own...has perished.

At the hands of one of you.]

Comments

[accessorytomurder]

He will.

[She lets out a soft, careful sigh.]

It's... I just... i-if...

[She doesn't want to say it.]

If it keeps happening... if, if it happens to me next time, then, um, then, you... you both have to remember that, okay? I love you. I love you. Y-You... you don't need a name, to know that.

[onemolife]

[ Rip, Dazai.

He'll come over at that, to lean down to plant a kiss on top of her head. ]

Don't worry, I'll be sure to remind him if he ever happens to forget that. I doubt that he could ever though.

[ I love you is aimed at Dazai and considering Dazai's words around the beginning of this that implied a bit more than just happiness and what Hitoka has been for him, he knows there's no way he'd forget that feeling. ]

[cw_suicide]

[he should be so happy to hear those words, see the clear affection from them both and maybe part of his heart beating so rapidly is from that but largely, he just feels like it's being gripped in a vice of fear and anxiety--inevitably, the things he reaches for get taken away.

it's going to happen again, isn't it.

a laugh comes up, almost involuntarily. habitual.]

If I did, I'd really be no good at all.

[accessorytomurder]

That wasn't a singular 'you,' Xian-kun.

[She lifts her head, and when her gaze meets each of theirs, it's surprisingly fierce beneath the feath and dismay.]

And Osamu, don't start saying that again. 'Good' or 'no good'... You're both worth a lot more than that, to me.

[onemolife]

[ There's a pause there as he looks genuinely surprised. Look, he's slow when it comes to people's feelings and affection aimed at him.

Though Dazai's laugh is a bit concerning, so he'll reach over to brush his fingers against his cheek. ]

You heard what the lady said.

[ For both things said. ]

[cw_suicide]

[he's only being honest!]

I know. I heard. I hear you, Hitoka.

[it's time to give her a kiss because her face is no longer tucked away]

[accessorytomurder]

You always hear me. I just... I wish it was easier to make you believe it, too.

[But she accepts the kiss and squeezes the back of Wei Wuxian's shirt, all the same.]

...I'm sorry I've been such a wreck, this week.

[onemolife]

[ They can just cover him with sticky notes or something until he believes.

He sees that smile though. He knows it's hard, especially since he can't physically see emotions or what good he has done. ]

There's no need to apologize for that. There's been quite a few surprises and it also wound up being similar to what we've experienced for.

[ Murder games, forgetting things, weed cookies... ]

[cw_suicide]

[this is also the slightly stung look of... he does actually believe it? or at least... believes her view of it and... apparently, that's falling short. he's still just falling short.

how does human, anyway...?

well, a glance to WWX before he gently headbutts Hitoka seems in order.]

A wreck, maybe, but one that's been determinedly pushing at others in spite of that. I heard you scolded Sensei, even.

[accessorytomurder]

[She sees that look and bonks him right back.]

You believe me. Not yourself.

[He’ll never love himself as much as she loves him. That’s an uncomfortable and slightly chilling fact, but it’s one she can’t ignore. She loves him—every bit of him he lets her see. And she doesn’t love his self-disdain and self-destructive interests, but those are loadbearing pillars of his identity. She’s been trying to build better support for him since... basically the day they met. For months and months, she’s tended to him and encouraged him and...

Well.

If something happens to her, she is brutally terrified that all of that might come crumbling down. She’s less aware of just where Wei Wuxian’s pillars lie, due to the vacation separation, but he and Dazai have always resonated on multiple levels. He’s no less of a worry in her heart.]

It’s... the similarities have been cutting me deeper than expected. That—pool—it...

[She takes a deep shaky breath.]

I still have nightmares about anyone other than me triggering that trap, back in the master bedroom, or getting caught in the showers. A-And I can’t... I can’t be insurance for other people right now. And that m-makes everything so much worse.

[She had voted for herself, more than once, rather than write the name of the person she knew was doomed. That’s just the type of woman she is.]

...so, no matter wh-what happens, tomorrow or next week or... you know. Even if I-I’m not here, or one of us g-goes... goes missing... I just. I-I.

[Oh, dammit. She’s getting choked up.]