dr. romani archaman (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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thefoundation2020-05-02 07:08 pm
finalring) wrote in thefoundation2020-05-02 07:08 pm
Entry tags:
the truth is, everyone wishes to be saved.
The execution has come and passed with the death of two more Agents. However time moves on without cease and so must the living. There are no celebrations, only the silence that grows heavier and heavier with every day and the feeling that something is pleased with what it has done.
There are two more days before the new week arrives: what will you do?
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[ None of the other rooms were ideal, so he simply decided to lead him to his own. He'll move to seat himself on a bed once they're inside
Gilgamesh debated getting out the drinks again, feeling slightly tempted. But he'll see how he felt and the Doctor did in the midst of this conversation first. ]
Sit down. [ And he'll just steamroll into things, it's fine. ] From what I understood, there's something to be found given the temporary foolishness you displayed in the trial. Tell me when you find it.
You will tell me some of your thoughts. Now. I've no interest in suffering foolishness, but to allow you to drown in your misery is something I cannot abide either.
private
[ temporary foolishness, huh? romani has to hold himself back from out right laughing in gilgamesh's face. of course, if what he's looking for is naught but a normal raccoon, then he'll take it. he'll take the mockery and everything that comes with it. hell, he'll take it even now.
it's just one of the many things that the doctor feels like he deserves. ]
My thoughts... I don't know what to tell you, Gilgamesh. I don't know what to tell you that I can allow this house knowing.
[ the enemy is everywhere. perhaps, next week, gilgamesh will become part of the enemy too. and even if he doesn't, there are eyes and ears everywhere. he wants to trust him, he wants to start talking-- but he can't. ]
I think...that I was one of those that broke the tie. Back there in the trial. And I...feel so damn guilty. I will stand by the fact that I believe I made the best decision tactically, but that doesn't make it go down any easier.
[ not when he had to witness the consequences of his actions right next to him. ]
It used to be so much easier, you know? But...now it feels like I just dug a knife into myself.
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[ At that answer to the King's first demand, the blond wore an unreadable expression. Romani could be forgiven for thinking he displeased him, though it'd be pretty much almost instantly usually to tell when his mood had soured, so at the same time it may be easy to tell that wasn't it either. ]
Then don't bother. I've no interest in any useless findings by a mongrel unless they can be used immediately to my advantage.
[ And now, to focus on the voting...it was indeed a deplorable outcome. But, he did have further thoughts on them as well, even if they were cold. ]
It was the best decision to make at the time, besides of course putting an end to that so-called ninja's foolish plan. That mongrel was bound to drag us down sooner or later. Though she will naturally prove to bolster the ghosts with her magecraft, she would doubtlessly become a liability as time went on.
I won't ask you to not shed tears for her, but I expect that you may be hounded for it if you've made it obvious, or tell so to the others. It'll be for the best if you kept such knowledge away from the others.
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[ well, gilgamesh wouldn't be happy to know that romani had not voted for zabuza in the first place. but he won't tell him that either. he can't. he musn't. the more people he tells, the more likely it is that someone will blurt it out and ruin everything.
is everything in ruins already?
no. we must keep fighting. ]
I've already shed my tears for her. Sho thought it was hilarious. [ not the point. he continues. ] Beyond my own morale, though, I need to find a way to keep the others' morale up as well. I've no doubt anymore that next week we'll have another death but I think there's something that we might be able to do in order to contain this place.
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Well, the ghost was lucky he hadn't done as much in his presence. That said, he'll rise to his feet to head to the desk in the room, and pull out two golden cups from it.
The blond considered some ideas as to how to keep morale afloat. A speech wouldn't be enough, though the idea of hope might be. ]
Hm...it could be something as simple as inviting in a good mood, but as you've informed me, you're hardly a jester. [ Ha. ] Though, anything further such as frivolous activities may hardly be acceptable depending on what occurs in the middle of the week.
Encouraging 'belief' and 'hope' in of itself could be enough.
But the fact that you may have found a solution is not lost to me. I anticipate you will act when the opportunity is right, and provided these mongrels are not incompetent, they shall follow suit.
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[ which is why he doesn't want to say it's a solution yet, because they still don't know how to make it out of the house.
he doesn't want to raise people's expectations--including his own--and have the house destroy that hope the same way it has done so every week. ]
But I'm not sure when the opportunity will come...more people may have to die, too before that time comes.
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[ He'll be taking out that container of alcohol he hid under the bed and begin to pour them each a drink.
It really was something.
Gilgamesh had cautioned Hikage against holding high expectations, so he won't dare to hold such things himself. Still, hearing this was enough. ]
Such will likely be the nature of our situation, Doctor. It's not the first time many lives will be lost before a total victory is achieved.
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the reflection that stares back...he can barely stand it. ]
I know. But it feels different. More personal, I suppose. It's difficult to separate my own feelings from what needs to be done.
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[ Gilgamesh won't stare for long at his drink in comparison, taking a gulp right after he sat down. He was in quite a mood to have at it, so already he was thinking about pouring himself another when he was done. ]
Still, you've put forward your best effort despite that. Even better than I originally anticipated, and considering the culmination of all your efforts so far. Though, in light of everything, I'd be hardly surprised if you'd barely be able to take such rare praise even from your King.
[ A wry expression almost reached him, even knowing that today was an absolute shitshow. ]
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[ he doesn't seem to be willing to either refute or support gilgamesh's praise. instead he gives him a weak laugh as he moves to sit next to the king.
he takes a drink of the drink, ignoring the slight burn of the alcohol. ]
I suppose I'm just... a little tired, right now. If I'm allowed to admit that. [ gilgamesh should know that this is the understatement of the century. ]
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...Nevermind the simple fact that I'd be honestly surprised if you weren't, due to the nature of our environment.
[ Gilgamesh will turn so he could see the man properly as he sat nearby him, words spoken a bit more softly than before, and he took another gulp of his drink...which meant that by him doing so that he would need to pour himself another. But he'll hold off for a second.
With Romani so close now, Gilgamesh could reach out and touch. The man who he stated he wanted by his side.
So he did, fingers slightly brushing against those bangs of his, but he allowed his hand to drop all too quickly, as something impulsive gripped him. ]
Look at me.
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ah, but is it so odd? the king has a charisma that goes beyond what the tales said, plus his own feelings that he kept trying so hard to ignore. for the sake of the mission, for the sake of keeping a clear mind, for the fear he felt deep inside him, beyond anything that the miasma could cause.
oh, how he wished that these feelings could bloom properly. and he also found himself wishing that they’d wilt into nothing—that, at least, would be so much easier.
he feeling of gilgamesh’s fingers on his hair makes his breath hitch and his cheeks turn a light red, however, as he looks at the king with wide eyes. ]
Gil...gamesh...?
1/2
Gilgamesh wanted to lightly touch him again, to see that face of his turn a little more red than it already had now. He had thought before that Romani looked rather adorable when surprised, but now it was different. It felt like the expression of someone before he'd even dare to claim them as his. Indeed, he had thought about it before...but being in a miasma house did wonders in killing his urges to have a time with someone.
But as he thought, Gilgamesh enjoyed such honest expressions the most...and even moreso on the Doctor's face. It seemed so innocent, after all. ]
Have I given you permission to address me so casually...?
[ Gilgamesh's voice was low, and his eyes carried a hint of an emotion he would dare not name, but his words came across somehow lightly as if in a tease. ]
2/2
Regardless of what happened to them, he should ensure that at least one of the things he desired came to fruition. What they would do in the aftermath was an unknown, but he would at least have this kiss should he have his way. And of course he was so used to having it.
So, he will place one hand on the red head's cheek, and this time lean forward in the interest of capturing Romani's lips with his own. ]
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[ ah.
the moment that gilgamesh closes the space between the two of them feels like an eternity for romani. the feelings he has--both good and bad--are intense, and not because of the miasma's fault. the miasma has nothing to do with this, in fact.
he feels yearning. he feels guilt. happiness and sorrow and everything in between, as he settles his free hand on gilgamesh's cheek and as he kisses back before pushing himself away--eyes averted.
his expression looks pained, however, like there's something that he really wants to say. ]
King Gilgamesh--I'm.... [ there's a long pause as he takes a deep breath, pulling farther away. ] I'm not... who you think I am.
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The King watched the man's pained expression carefully. One in which seemed to indicate that there was something he'd want to tell him.
Of course, Gilgamesh wouldn't exactly call himself a patient man. If he was anything like that, it was only by necessity, and because he's had to be so in order to achieve what he's desired. Still, he'll wait patiently for Romani to manage those words, and indeed he did deliver...sort of. ]
Hmph, after that moment where your King has decided to impart to you some affection, that is your response?
[ But he supposed the time for such frivolous commentary had long since passed. Though he'll still let the question hang in the air before offering another. ]
...Tell me:
Who or what is it you believe that I think you are?
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[ an even longer silence hangs in the air after gilgamesh's question, his gaze unable to stay on the king's face. his expression is a mix of things: shame, frustration, and sadness. there's so much he wants to say, and so much that he can't-- because they too, will know.
but he doesn't want to be dishonest either. not to him.
he sighs. ]
I haven't always been human. In comparison to him, I've led an even shorter human life...but it had been my wish for a while now. As someone that was born and raised as His servant, I never had much option other than to follow His path as a tool. This was the first time I was given the chance to live a human life...and look where it has turned out.
[ hm. ]
These past weeks have been...the worst. But they've also been incredible, in a way. I don't think I've ever felt something the way I've felt for you, after all. [ there's a small laugh there, but it dies out rather quickly. ] I want to be as honest as possible...with you, at least. Because it's you. But I understand if you can't accept that, either.
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Well, actually, two now.
Either way, it's a rare chance here where he's speaking so candidly. How could he not? This was the time for it, after all. ]
...Whoever you were before we met does not matter to me.
[ Why would it? In their situation now, Gilgamesh could care less.
Not to mention, no one could consider a demigod human either, but he knew that wasn't the point of Romani's confession. ]
If I couldn't accept you as you are now, then I wouldn't have bothered to have you within my presence. Let it be known that you confiding this hasn't changed my mind at all in the slightest.
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[ that was... not the answer that romani expected at all. he expected something angrier, something more hurt and less... that.
he had prepared for the worst, and therefore something like this was...almost like a blessing of sorts. romani still looked somewhat skittish, but the smile on his face is honest—albeit with a hint of melancholy. ]
Thank you. Thank you for hearing me out. And I’m sorry I ruined the moment, too. [ he laughs softly. ] How can I make it up to you?
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[ What a cute fool he had. He'll have to treasure this moment for what it's worth, because he knew that it'll get worse. ]
You do realize there's only one way to make it up to your King, don't you? It won't even take that long for you to manage it.
[ Gilgamesh will allow himself a private smile, reserved for the few who managed to become important to him. No hint of melancholy or sadness whatsoever...if anything there was probably a hint of that ever-present constant confidence that could bubble into an absurd amount of arrogant. There was also a teasing tone present, naturally.
His hand will raise to cup the other's cheek. Of course he wanted another kiss before they turned in. He was selfish and demanding, so it was only to be expected, right? ]
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[ there's a chuckle that comes from romani, leaning into the tender gesture for a second, relishing in that small moment.
even now, in this small, enclosed hell, he realized that he was still able to feel happiness.
gathering whatever threads of his confidence that he could find, romani leans forward, closing the space between himself and the king with a soft, but earnest kiss. ]
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He never said anything about not doing so.
Though he'll allow himself a brief smile in the midst of that and he'll see if he could slip a hand to pull the tie out of Romani's hair towards the end of the kiss.
It'd been awhile since he'd seen it down, after all. ]