From the white lights, the darkness comes...

[sageking]

Today's trial was a mixture of regret, anger, guilt, and second-thoughts. Perhaps some people realized that situations and choices weren't to be black or white. However, decisions were made, and whether it'd be through people keeping secrets or causing a ton of chaos...everyone could probably agree on one thing:

They've made their choices and no matter what happened in the coming days, they will lie in the beds they made for themselves. Whatever that should mean for each and every single person still living here.

That being said, there's still new choices to make. In the days to come, what will those be?

Comments

[onemolife]

Is there a time limit or a way to pay for longer use?

[ Nonsense is better than... the other thing they can talk about. He's not ready to talk abut Ango memories or things shared. ]

[cw_suicide]

... I see. Makes sense.

You know... you do remind me of someone I know back home.

Though he's definitely more of a judging sort--he always means well by it. He's just the type who wants to see good in people, even the bad ones.

Or, that's how people would put it. "Good" and "bad" aren't really concepts I dabble in.

[impyroverished]

[Pretty normal...that's a relief. Then he wasn't turning into some weird loose cannon. That's one weight less off his shoulders]

For a moment I really thought Subete had managed to do something against those Vessels...

[Even if it was for a moment, it kind of felt like...like maybe they had gained an edge. Alas, wasn't true]

[oxidegreen]

It is. I'm not suited for it at all.

[She's seen too much horribleness. There's so much to hate about people, and it keeps bringing those thoughts right up to the surface again.]

[boardreversal]

...I don't...I don't know.

[It's small, but...

His hand's still trembling.]

I heard you scream, at the trial....and, instead of feeling...vindicated, I just felt afraid. Seeing you hurt, I...I hated it. I hate it.

And....I just found myself - coming here, with what little medicine Rin still had...because she wouldn't want you in pain, either. Or, maybe that's just my own...wishful thinking...

[He's tearing up, now.]

...I...should be mad at you, right? You....hurt me, so badly...yet, whenever I think about it, I just feel like someone's stabbing me in the chest. Even now, I...

I'm just....happy that finally, I could help you.

...Isn't that...weird...? Maybe I really am just....damaged. Or a masochist - hahaha, maybe that's it...It'd explain - a lot -

['....Ah, I can't....speak anymore.
There's this choking sensation in my throat, like someone's gripping me from the inside...
...']

[boardreversal]

...What is it?

[The promise, he means. Not the dead friend.]

cw: suicide-ish

[cw_suicide]

[well. no reason to keep secrets anymore.

Ango coming on Monday and all.]

... "good" and "bad" aren't concepts that I really believe that strongly in. Whether you kill someone or save them--someone generally ends up dead, right?

I joined the mafia thinking that being so close to situations where humans experience the most intense of emotions because of violence, greed, and survival... maybe it would move me enough to have reason to live.

It didn't work at all. I only found less reasons to want to.

So I thought.

... before Odasaku died, in my arms... he told me to try to be on the side that saves. That it wouldn't help that emptiness, but maybe... it would make me a better man. Just a little.

It's actually a foolish kind of endeavor but... I am still here. Somehow.

[kaliedoscopes]

I think I'm used to it, it's growing more familiar day by day. [ His smile is perhaps a bit misplaced, but his tone does match. ]

[finalring]

...Battler.

[ romani’s heart sinks further and further into his chest and stomach as battler struggles to explain himself. he settles his one good hand on battler’s, if only just to keep him from moving so much.

the painkillers... they help. he still hurts, of course, but now it’s.... just a little closer to bearable. ]

Battler, you are not damaged. I don’t care what anyone says, because you are somebody that is going through a terrible situation. You know who’s really damaged? Those that can watch everything happen and not bat an eyelash.

[ ... ]

I’m sorry for... what I did.

[ and while he’s trying to keep himself from crying, the way he hangs head and his shoulders shake is indicative that he is very close to crying. ]

[boardreversal]

['I'm sorry for...what I did.'

He'd said it before, on that day - but now, it's like it's really sinking in. Those tears - finally start spilling over, because he can't...contain them in anymore.

But it's also still so hard to figure out what's even happening. What does he feel in this situation? Happy? Sad? Angry? Upset? Relieved? All of them, all at the same time?]

Romani...sensei.

[But, there's something at the forefront - past all the pain and mixed feelings, all the questions he wants to ask and even the darker side urging him to lash out to relieve the hurt that he's pushing down.]

....I...

[He stops, wrestling with it. It'd be the last thing he could withhold - let Romani suffer with it, just let the moment pass him by...lord over this moment.

...But that'd just be him, continuing his family's legacy, wouldn't it? All the pain being cycled over and over, to the extreme he's seen and experienced in Rosa.

And he...doesn't want that. Because....Romani's also been suffering, hasn't he? He's finally...finally, showing a little bit of it, after all this time.

So -

He takes a breath, then another.

And he says it.]

...I...I know. And I....I forgive you, Sensei.

[ghostricked]

Family is Complicated.

[He presses against Battler's leg. Sissel has had the chance to get to know Rosa a little better now- so he can't hate her. But he can't help but be mad that she doesn't seem to realize how she's hurting his friend]

But how she thinks of you isn't your responsibility.

[ghostricked]

Yeah. Humans like to think they're above that kind of thing. But they're not really that different from other animals. The difference is that humans have these complicated webs of fate and relationships- things like 'dying well' that doesn't matter for the rest of us can change a lot in their worlds.

That's something I learned when I was a 'human' for a night.

[ghostricked]

At first I did too, but the tone Flayn used when she came back as that big lizard... he might have hurt them, but not nearly enough. Brute force won't be enough.

[ghostricked]

Ah, so that's what it is. I was wondering.

What gives me my powers is deep in my body- do you think it'd still affect it?

[ghostricked]

[He jumps up on the table- there was no way he missed the talk of Nanaka's time limit, but bringing it up right now seems...too much. So he just bumps against her]

[soupervillain]

Oh hi, Hellcat. Doing okay?

[ Giovanni looks up from his book, which he was barely reading anyway. He puts a hand out to rub the top of Sissel's head, assuming he's in the mood for headpats. ]

Hey, do you think you could do me a favor? I mean... I have an order for you! As my minion and right-hand cat!

[ghostricked]

[He's almost always in the mood for headpats- and Giovanni correcting himself makes him chuckle]

Sure Captain, what do you need?

[white_camellia]

[Nanaka just kind of... automatically starts petting Sissel in response, she has been trained well.]

The upcoming weeks are going to be particularly important. A proper opportunity should show itself, sooner or later. Everyone needs to be prepared to take advantage of it when it comes.

[reanimania]

Right.

[ he completely understands this sentiment and definitely isn't hiding his own personal stash of healing items!! ]

I don't think I need to tell you to take it easy this week. Both because you know better and because you have plenty of people who will throw you back in here if you don't.

[ghostricked]

You're right. It's going to be do or die.

[reanimania]

[ scrambling to grab those pliers and run back to his robot!! ]

G-good evening, Miss Olympia. Can I help you?

[reanimania]

[ Oh god somehow he still manages to hear that line in the most horror-movie way possible. He freezes in place, then very slowly turns around. ]

N-no, I think I'm fine, thank you.

[reanimania]

[ he's... around... ]

[finalring]

Do you think I'll actually get the luxury to take it easy this week? Look at all that happened just while I was passed out.

[ doctors suck as patients! here's the prime example. ]

[finalring]

...That's...a shame, really. That you weren't able to have a normal childhood.